Sunday Pep Talk | Trust Yourself

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Hello, friends! I have a secret to tell you. I don’t actually have any new years resolutions yet. I know. LAME. But there are things I want to do more of, and less of. I just haven’t gotten around to setting them as goals that I will actively work towards achieving. I mean, I made blog goals, and intentions, but those aren’t quite as real as resolutions, which I take to be things you actively do in your life to change things. Just to recap, in 2018 I:

Made my bed every morning
Got my mental health under control
Started therapy
Began a new job

This year, the things I’d like to do are:

Take care of more plants
Monetize my blog
Take my photography business to the next level
Move into my own apartment
Buy a new car
Publish that book I’m sitting on

These are big things. HUGE things. Cars are expensive. Apartments are also expensive. But if I can get my other goals completed, that shouldn’t really be an issue. 2019 will be a year about learning I can do the things, and then just doing the damn things. I always make excuses for why I can’t be a professional blogger and photographer. Interestingly enough, grad school did not make it onto that list. It’s something I’ve been considering ever since I graduated from undergrad, but for some reason I just can’t commit to that. Maybe it’s because I feel like the surreptitious college scam is finally coming to light, the idea that you need college to make money, when really all they do is enslave you to student loans. Graduate school is a ton of money! Sure, I could do it, but would I be any better off than I am now? I may have a better job, but I’d be paying more on my student loans. It’s a giant catch 22.

So instead, I’ve decided that 2019 will be focused on what I can do for myself with my own God-given talents. Not everyone can write, or take pictures, or both. I know I can do these things, but 2019 will be about accepting that I can do them for money. It’s easy! And graduate school will always be there, right? I just have to trust that I am on the right path and that I will lead myself exactly where I need to go.

And you should too! Trust that you know what’s best for yourself. If that means totally changing careers or ending a relationship with someone who loves you but who you’ve fallen out of love with, do the damn thing. This is your life. You have the power to make it anything you want it to be. Remember that your feelings are just as valid as anyone else’s. So listen to yourself. Trust yourself!

Words Of Widsom | Rob Reiner |Fix Yourself

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“Everybody talks about wanting to change things and help and fix, but ultimately all you can do is fix yourself. And that’s a lot. Because if you can fix yourself, it has a ripple effect.”
Rob Reiner

How To | Dealing With A Life Plateau

Recently my life has revolved around self improvement. After going through “tower” energy–which for those of you who do not follow tarot, means a huge shakeup that levels everything you knew down to the foundation so that you can build something up stronger–my focus was on fixing myself. The process of healing became my raison d’etre. But now that I feel my healing is coming to an end, I am left with a confounding feeling of “what do I do now?”

If you’ve spent so much time focusing on one thing, when it ends, you might end up feeling a little lost, or like you’ve hit a plateau. Everyone in life encounters plateaus from time to time, whether it follows a new job that was once challenging but now is so routine that it has become boring, or whether you feel like you’re in the best shape of your life. Well what do you do when your health stops improving? What happens when you’ve mastered a job?

Naturally, the human inclination is to move onto something else, something better. We are constantly in a state of evolution. Humans constantly seek a new challenge. When we reach a state of peace or contentment, our nature is to create chaos, to shake things up, or to find struggle. Think about Adam and Eve. They were placed into paradise where everything was perfect. They wanted for nothing. But wouldn’t perfection like that get boring? Of course it would! Why do you think they took a risk with the apple? Because it is human nature. In more practical terms, “paradise” might be related to boredom. When you are bored it means that there is nothing to do, nothing to think about, nothing to work on. You literally are searching for something to do. You are not content to sit there and do nothing, which might sometimes be the case when you take a break from something you are currently invested in. But when you are truly bored, you aim to end that state of boredom. How? By creating conflict. The conflict might be as simple as getting up off the couch and cleaning the kitchen. Whatever it is, human nature dictates that when we become bored with things in life, we tend to shake things up.

It’s why so many people become addicted to drama. Drama constantly shakes things up. It constantly creates conflict that keeps things moving, keeps your lessons coming, keeps your life interesting. Of course not everyone adheres to drama. For those people who are relatively drama-free, they find their shake up in other ways. Perhaps those who do not seek drama already have mentally stressful jobs that constantly require focus and energy. Ever seen a dramatic doctor? Chances are low. And if they were dramatic, it probably means they don’t have many clients. The two are inversely proportionate to one another. Drama is the antithesis to hard work. Both create struggle in two very different ways. Both also serve the function of quelling boredom.

In shorter terms, you’re either working hard to change something in your life, or you’re bitching about it. The only way you are doing neither is if you’re catatonic or dead.

But I digress.

What does this have to do with plateaus?

Plateaus are what is created when you are in a state of boredom. Plateaus follow completions. Plateaus are a good thing! But when they last for long periods of time, it can make you feel a little anxious. Oh my gosh, I’m not doing anything with my life now. Your human mind is looking for the next challenge to occupy itself. How very masochistic.

In my example, for the last eight months I have been working on self improvement. I got my mental health under control, increased my income, got over a tough breakup, and learned some new skills. But over time, the thrill of these things began to fade. Now I am faced with…boredom. I have improved as much as I can at this point in my life. I hit all of my goals for the year. I have hit a plateau. But I’m not worried, because I know that plateaus don’t last forever.

As one very cool dude in history once said, or maybe it was from a book or the bible, “this too shall pass”.

So how do you “pass the kidney stone” of plateaus? Let’s look at some ideas.


Read

Reading is one of the best pastimes when you are bored with your life. Is it a conflict or challenging? No, but by reading, you open your mind up to a multitude of new information, both fictional and realistic. Perhaps you will stumble upon something that sparks a new passion, a new goal, or a new life path. Knowledge is the key to contentment. And if you don’t find anything to break the plateau of your life, at least you’ve killed a few hours of that ever-nagging boredom.

Commit

It’s easy to love something and leave it, to get a job and quit as soon as it becomes routine. It’s so easy to give up. But to break a plateau, you must commit to something. That’s how you master it. That’s how you reach Lv. 100. That’s how you become better than the other guy. You stick with it. Sometimes the best way to beat a plateau is just to endure it and come out the other side. Appreciate the small things in life, take it one step at a time. Nothing lasts forever, and if you do nothing to break a plateau, believe me, the universe has got your back. She’ll do it for you, if you wait long enough. I think we call that fate, or luck, or whatever the hell…natural disasters. The unknown variable. Stick with something long enough and sooner or later you’re going to see some sort of universal shake up.

Meditate

Meditation is just a fancy word for deep thinking. Just kidding. No it’s not. But that’s a big part of mediation. It’s all mental. If you find that you are stuck at a certain point of your life and you aren’t sure which way to turn, try meditation. Along with all the other benefits of meditation, you might just find an answer to your questions too. Sometimes just by turning off the mental clutter and negative juju you feed yourself during periods of stagnation, you are able to focus in on what’s important and think of a plan for your next steps. Even if your next step in life is to become a cat. Yep, it can happen.

Go back

Plateaus are wonderful times for self reflection. You achieve a goal and you’re feeling great, but that emotional peak is followed by the dreaded plateau. Go back to the you that you were five years ago, or ten years ago, or fifty years ago. Celebrate your accomplishments. You are not the same person as you were back then. Try to remember what you thought of back then. Did you have different goals? What was important to you? What did you want to be when you grew up? All of these reflective questions can help bring you back to the core of who you are. I also highly recommend reverting a little bit. Yeah, I know regression isn’t healthy, but sometimes by listening to the music or visiting the websites or hobbies that you used to occupy your time with can give you a great counterbalance to where you are now. Go ahead and have a good chuckle about how you used to cosplay when you were fifteen and thought you were the coolest teenager alive, living their best life. Reconnect with that inner child and give them a chance to stretch their little legs. You might just find that the room you give yourself to go back will be all you need to propel yourself forward.

Step outside your comfort zone

No good story ever begins with “So I was eating a salad”. The best stories are the ones that involve two foot long spicy volcano burritos and a trip to the bathroom that would have made Lucifer himself proud (the hugest pun in history, nyuk nyuk nyuk). Do something that scares you a little bit. Have two scoops of ice cream. Go rock climbing. Rob a bank. Just kidding, don’t do that. You never know what you’ll encounter by taking a step outside your normal routine. By wondering off your beaten path, you might just find some beautiful flowers. You might discover you are not a person who likes two scoops of ice cream. Or you might find out that you are totally a person who loves two scoops and decides to join an ice cream enthusiast group. You might tumble off a canyon wall and right into the arms of your true love (don’t laugh, it actually happened). Nothing shakes up your world like doing something that scares the hell out of you.

Join an organization

So you’ve found something that you’re really passionate about. You spent the last six months researching old books. But now what? You’ve grown tired of browsing ebay for elusive copies of Thomas Hood and Marquis De Sade. Why not share that passion with a group of people with similar interests? The thing about human interaction is that it usually propels change. Maybe you’ll make a new best friend. Or meet someone that shoves you forcefully into your dream career of being a published author. You certainly aren’t going to meet these catalysts by sitting in your bedroom. By joining a club or organization, you are inviting change. It might not be the ultimate change that you imagined, but it might just be the push that gets the ball rolling.

Return to nature

I don’t know of any problems that can’t be solved by returning to nature. (Except perhaps life threatening diseases. Nature can’t really fix that. Go see a doctor.) Outside of that, however, nature is a great place to go when you’re feeling stagnant. Realign you energy, feel the wind tangling your hair into a rats nest, run away from ALL THE BEES. There is so much to see outside in nature, so much to experience. Nothing makes you appreciate your standing in life more than being chased five hundred feet by an angry mama bear. Perhaps you can dip your feet into the scum filled pond at your local park, or get a brilliant lobster red sunburn at the beach. All joking aside, getting some sunshine and fresh air is super healthy and I highly recommend it. It might not solve your plateau, but it will probably make you feel at least a little better.

Explore your world

Do you remember being little and exploring all sorts of things? Even something as foreign as your backyard was exciting. You could get your hands dirty and play in poison ivy with no cares in the world for the danger of scratching your own skin open while whining profusely to your mother about “oh my god, it burns! It burns!” Oh yes, exploration leads to strange and extraordinary opportunities to live. Now, as an adult, exploration doesn’t have to be so itchy. Instead, you can explore much more enjoyable things, like the new speakeasy in the cultural district, or the burlesque show that you would never ever have considered going to in your life. Boredom leads to very interesting shake ups. Even if you have to go exploring on your own, doing something new and exciting might just be enough to jar you out of your flatline lifestyle. Ever seen the movie Eyes Wide Shut? You know, the movie with the infamous orgy? The main character in that movie leads a perfectly normal life. He has a good job, a lovely wife, everything a middle aged person could possibly want. Because of that contentment, he creates drama by following a metaphorical white rabbit into a world of secret societies, weird sex things, and danger. Of course there’s more to it than that, but just roll with it for the analogy.

Make new goals

And lastly, and probably most obviously, make new goals. When you hit a certain level, the next logical step is to climb to the next. Unless you are one of the most powerful and rich people in the world, there is always room to improve. There is always room to learn more, meet new people, and experience new challenges. Make a list of goals for the next year, the next five years, the next ten years. Determine that you want to join the peace corps, or remodel your house, or get married. One of those new goals could even be as ambitious as being president someday. I mean, they’re letting anyone run for president these days, so…


What do you do when you’re feeling stuck or stagnant in life? Leave a comment! 

Talk later, friends! 

Sunday Pep talk | Slow and Steady

It’s so easy to be too hard on yourself. Just think of where you were a year ago. Think of how far you’ve come. So you aren’t where you want to be. That’s ok. You are better than you were yesterday, and even if you are taking baby steps, you are slowly becoming the person you want to be. I know progress is slow sometimes, so slow that it looks like nothing is changing, but with each decision you make, you are actively working to change your life.

Please don’t beat yourself up if you didn’t reach all of your goals yet.

Did you reach one of them? Even a small one?

Then that’s enough to congratulate yourself on. Celebrate the small victories. Give thanks for every opportunity in life, whether it is a step in the right direction or a lesson that had to be learned. Positive and negative things all happen for a reason. So don’t view something negative as a failure. It was something that you needed to learn from.

The wisest people in the world are the ones who have made the most mistakes.

And they grew because of it. Keep going. Keep reaching for your goals and your dreams. It may not look like it today, or tomorrow, but one day you will look back and realize that you have been making progress. Just focus on making positive decisions in life. You will get there. Good things take time.

Don’t give up!

Self Care on a Budget

How To Self Care On A Budget

 

How many of you watch self care videos on YouTube or read blog posts that lay out a routine most of us wish we could indulge in whenever we have a bad day? These self care posts often focus on the products you can buy for the best skin, the best relaxation, and the best detoxes. All of these products are very enticing, but for those who are living life from paycheck to paycheck, it can sometimes be difficult to keep up with all those fancy trends. This can often lead to feelings of inadequacy or negative self talk.

I can’t afford that kind of moisturizer. Who has the extra cash to take a weekend yoga retreat, or Caribbean vacation? There’s no way I can afford a gym membership and also dinner for this week. It costs how much for an organic coconut oil vegan facial scrub? No thanks, I have school loans to pay.

The need to care for yourself and nurture your body and soul shouldn’t be at the expense of sacrificing other everyday needs. Finances aside, I am a huge fan of all the self care videos and blog posts online. They always inspire me and motivate me to live that kind of life, but I do things a little differently, and maybe you do too, or would like to. Through my twenties I have developed a self care routine that works best for me, my budget, and my lifestyle.

The stresses of life can pile up rather easily, so it’s important to set aside time to focus on recharging your energy. Self care doesn’t have to only be about the products you buy. For me, self care is about nourishing my soul, getting back in tune with myself and my spirituality, and coping with the pile of stress that collects like a stack of bills at the back of your mental workstation. And most of these are of little or no cost to yourself; things that you can do no matter what your social standing in life may be.

When I am feeling like I need to focus on myself, I do any number of the following.


Hot Shower

The first thing I do when I need to cleanse my body and soul is to take a nice hot shower. As Sylvia Plath states in The Bell Jar, it’s as if the stresses of the day wash off along with the dirt and oil and go right down the drain. I’ve often felt on the verge of tears, have stepped into the steam and heat of a shower and by the end I am relaxed and calm. After stressful events like job interviews, social gatherings, or dates that didn’t quite go as well as you had hoped, there is nothing better than stripping off all those tight clothes, losing the bra, taking off your makeup, and just being the free little soul that you are. Take the time to look at yourself in the mirror before you get into the shower, and instead of shouting negatives in your mind, be kind to yourself. You are beautiful despite all your wrinkles, stretch marks, and belly rolls.

Yoga/Stretching

Some days my yoga routine is meant to be a workout as well as a stretch–Do ALL the planks, master ALL the pilate’s, get ALL the abs!–but on my self care days, I like to take it easy with the positions I do. It’s all about trusting your body and doing what feels nice. Don’t stress about doing the poses right. This is a time for you to get in tune with your physical body. I mainly focus on small stretches. Starting in a seated position, I stretch one arm up and over my body in a sideways bend, and then the other. I then do some shoulder and head rolls. After that, I stretch out my legs in a forward sitting fold. I find that on self care days I general gravitate towards things low to the floor, so back stretches also help. Laying on my back, I twist one leg over my body while looking over the opposite shoulder, and lastly I finish by hugging my knees to my chest and rolling my lower back along the floor before settling down into corpse pose (which is by far my favorite!).

I really like Yoga With Adriene on Youtube. It always makes my day going through a nice easy session with her. 

Meditation

Yep, back to the ol’ meditation tip. The thoughts that weight heavy on your mind are able to be released when you actively try to clear your mind. I find that listening to meditation music helps get me in a nice comfortable mental zone. One of my favorite things to focus on during meditation is The Box. It’s a cognitive exercise where you take all the negative thoughts about yourself or from your stressful day, picture them as a physical object, and place them inside the box. Once inside, they can’t get out. Then picture placing the box somewhere in your mind and forgetting about it. The nice thing about this is that the box is infinite. You can pour as much negativity inside the box as you wish, just like Pandora’s box!

Another cognitive exercise I like to do while meditating is to picture myself someplace where I feel absolutely stress free and content. Recently, this has been in a small cottage on a prairie along the edge of a forest, where speckled sunlight shines through the trees and creates a golden paradise. In this safe space in my mind, I often try to get in touch with my inner child, which always appears to me as a grey cat. By focusing on the grey cat, I am able to reinforce positivity and ignore the negative thoughts for a while. This also gives me an opportunity to have a conversation with my inner child, or inner self. Check in with yourself. The way we talk to ourselves really makes a difference, so be kind.

Physical Care

I said this was a self care post on a budget, and I meant it. This is usually the point where all those vloggers and bloggers start whipping out their designer hand lotions, hundred dollar facial moisturizers, anti wrinkle cream that would cost my left tit to buy, and a smorgasbord of other odds and ends to get the flawless skin everyone wishes they could have. (Even though, if we’re being totally honest, all they probably did for their videos was apply a heavy layer or two of foundation, which can make anyone look flawless on film).

I’m about to be very real with you right now. My skin care routine consists of this: Since my face is usually nice and clean from the shower, I apply Clinique moisture surge. It’s the most expensive thing I own, so let’s get it out of the way right now. I use Clinique Moisture Surge because I have dry-ass skin that makes me molt like a snek after one of my nice hot showers. This moisturizer is the only one I have found that doesn’t cause me to break out. As soon as I apply it I feel like my face just took a nice healthy drink of water, and it stays moisturized all through the day or night, whenever I apply it. Without it I would look like a clay golem in desperate need of some rain.

Now I’m about to share with you a marvelous secret. After applying my face moisturizer, I moisturize my body. Not with Jergen’s, not with coconut oil, not with some weird concoction of olive oil, bee’s wax, and creme fraiche. You ready for this? I use Johnson’s baby lotion. It works SO much better than any of those super expensive luxury moisturizers, and leaves my skin feeling so smooth and soft afterwards. The other thing I like about it is that it absorbs rather quickly. I hate moisturizing my body and then having to stand there like a starfish waiting for it to all get soaked in as I stand in front of my fan.

That’s it. That’s the end of my physical care. Sometimes I will repaint my nails or exfoliate my gross disgusting hobbit feet, but that’s only if I’m feeling really frisky. (Just kidding, I have adorable little hobbit feet)

Oh, and don’t forget to drink water! It’s an absolutely affordable way to get better skin, better digestion, and better overall health. You’re made up of water. Never forget to hydrate!

Comfort food

When you’re having a bad day, nothing compares when it comes to feeling better than eating some of your favorite foods. Most of my weekdays are spent eating healthy foods and smart choices. I will limit the amount of carbs, cheese, and meats I eat, even though these are my favorites. But on self care days, anything goes. I think most people call these “cheat days”? Where you sit down with a bowl of mac n cheese big enough to feed a family and chicken nuggets, and eat until you are so satisfied that you can’t eat another bite. And who can forget dessert? I always treat myself to a fabulous dessert item on self care days. Sometimes I will even go to the store specifically to buy a fancy little dessert like a parfait, chocolate mousse, or little cupcake from the bakery section.

Journaling

Once my skin is all drank and my mind is all clear and my belly is all full, I take the time to write in my journal. Sometimes I journal on my phone in an app called Day One, and other times I use a physical journal. I like the feeling of writing things down in an actual notebook with a cool cactus or unicorn pen from target (which you can get in the little $1 bin up near the front), but sometimes my mind moves faster than my hand and I end up frustrated, which is like, the opposite of a good thing for self care. So usually I use Day One and get out all the lingering thoughts for my day. I’m one of those super linear people who writes down what they ate and what the weather was like, along with pouring my heart out about social issues or money problems. I’ve been consistently journaling for about a year now, and it’s really interesting to be able to look back on my past entries to see what sort of mindset I was in during which days and which months and which life events. The other cool thing about Day One is that you can add a picture to your journal entries, and depending on where the picture was taken, it will create a map for you that tells you where you were and when. When you click on a map point, it will take you to that journal entry. So Cool!

Writing/Working on a creative project

Different than journaling, which is often personal and cathartic, I like to follow that up by working on a creative project such as blogging or creative writing, or even drawing. I have real issues with self-loathing when it comes to productivity. I feel that if I’m not creating something at all times, I’m a loser. That’s something I really need to work on. But I still like being productive when I can. At the end of the night is my favorite time to write because it gives me motivation to incorporate the happenings of the day into my work. I will also use this creative time to brainstorm blog post ideas or work on my websites/social media presence.

Friendship appreciation

I often also incorporate a section of time where I can be social. I will send my friends “hello, how are you?” texts just to check in and make sure they’re doing ok. Sometimes they need some time to vent too, and having a friend to listen to you sometimes means the world to someone. It also helps to feel more connected when you actively reach out to your loved ones. When was the last time you called your mom? When did you text your sister? Even small gestures are sometimes enough to make huge differences in someone’s life.

Selfies

Yep, I’m one of those girls. But taking selfies just reaffirms to myself that I’m a cutie and worthy of love and acceptance too. It’s a great feeling to appreciate yourself. Of course I will snapchat it up until my phone dies, but sometimes I just like appreciating the natural beauty that is me. With my blemished skin and blue veins and short eyelashes and all my double chins. Yeah, baby. It’s also really fun to dress up as glamorous as you want and take selfies that way. There’s nothing more satisfying than slipping into your favorite dress or pair of shoes for some personal selfie shots! And hey, appreciate that little booty of yours. Just because it isn’t a bubble butt doesn’t mean it’s not cute.


And there you have it. These are some of my favorite things to do on a self care day. As you can see, a lot of these cost little to no money at all to do. Not everything has to be about what you own or what products you use. Some of my favorite self care techniques are more about nurturing my internal spirit and finding peace within myself.


 

Do you have any specific things you always love to do on self care days? I’d love to hear from you!

Take care!

 

Comparing Appearances

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Overthinking

You spent hours doing your hair and makeup, you slipped into an outfit that makes you feel bangin’, you look yourself over in the mirror and give yourself a kiss and a wink, and then you head out the door to start your day. Things are looking good, the sun is shining, you’re feeling hot as hell, and then you spot her. Maybe she’s walking down the other side of the street from you, or maybe she’s buying the coffee in front of you in line at the Dunkin Donuts. Wherever you are, it inevitably happens to us all. You see someone rocking their look and immediately compare ourselves to them.

She’s cuter than me. Her hair isn’t frizzy like mine is. That lipstick matches her skin tone perfectly. Is mine too bright? I wish I had thighs like that. She looks like she could crush a man’s head like a grape with those things. If only I was that skinny. If only my smile was that gorgeous. If only I had her confidence.

You think about it for the rest of your day, or more accurately, you’re not thinking about her, you’re thinking about yourself and how you look like you’ve just wandered out of the dumpster. The same outfit you blew kisses to earlier that morning. The same hair you put in the effort to make just the way you like it. Suddenly these things don’t seem like they were worth anything at all, because there’s someone out there that looks better than you. It deflates your entire posture, your eyes lose that sparkle, you only give half smiles for the rest of the day.

Guess what? Everyone around you noticed the change.

The Reality

Often times, the reason someone is attractive is not because of how they dress or the makeup they wear, or whether or not they can totally rock that pair of heels. The true reason why someone is attractive is their self-confidence and inner spark. You had it too, until you saw her and lost your groove. But this happens to us all at some point, right? Who hasn’t compared themselves to others? It’s only human nature; the nature of competition. But truly (if you haven’t figured this out yet, then get ready for a radical awakening), it doesn’t have to be a competition!

Yes, that’s right. That girl you saw is gorgeous! She is rocking her look! But that doesn’t mean that you can’t rock yours too. Jealousy is a human condition that we all feel at some point, but instead of creating a negative emotion out of that, why don’t we try to turn that into a positive?

You like the way she looked? Give her a compliment! Tell her you love her shoes that she is clearly rocking. Tell her you like her hair, because you know she spent hours on that this morning. And don’t let the comparison to her diminish your own light. Just because she looks good doesn’t mean you aren’t as gorgeous. No two people look the same in the whole wide world (unless you have a twin. In that case, you are both fabulous). We must learn that appreciating someone else’s appearance doesn’t mean that we have to disparage our own.

Love Yourself

I know I sometimes fall into this trap of shallowness, and that’s all it is, is shallowness. You are judging a person based on their appearance. We all do it! But why do we do it? When we see someone prettier or more put together than us, sometimes we turn that positive thing inwards and make it a negative. We do this because we are insecure about ourselves. Because maybe you tried really hard to do something different, maybe you did your makeup differently or tried out a new outfit that you weren’t too sure about, and that makes us vulnerable, because no matter how enlightened and awakened we are, part of us will always just want to be accepted by others.

But what if that girl is just like you? Maybe she’s feeling just as insecure inside.

Being comfortable in your own skin is something that takes time to master. Keep giving yourself positive affirmations. Keep giving kissy faces and winks to your reflection. Work out and eat healthy foods. Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be the best version of yourself you can be, because there’s not another one of you in the whole entire world (again, unless you are a twin, in which case, party on Garth).  We are each uniquely beautiful, and if you find your inner confidence you will be radiant!

Have a wonderful day, beautiful human!